Mouth Off to Telemarketers

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These calls are so much fun for me, and only because I used to be a telemarketer and I hated the job, the boss, the computer, the script, the earpiece, the breaks, everything about it I hated. So I take some delight in giving them a hard time at work.

I don’t have a home phone but if I did, it would go the same way…

Telemarketer: Could I speak with James please?
Me: May I ask who’s calling?
Telemarketer: Jane on a personal business matter.
Me: Would you pick up a call if that’s all I told you about the caller?
Telemarketer: Excuse me?
Me: Which James, there are two here.
Telemarketer: The owner of the business.
Me: Is this regarding business he currently does with your company?
Telemarketer: No.
Me: Is this a sales call?
Telemarketer: We’d like to see if he would be intereste-
Click. Dial tone.

Wasn’t that fun? I enjoy it so much. Sometimes they’ll call right back all ticked off I hung up on them and one time I was asked by a male telemarketer why I hung up on him. I told him no one was interested in what he was selling and my boss would fire me if I sent him that call. That shut him up.

Another time I had a sales call on my cell phone, which really pisses me off. This one I had a lot of fun with..

Me: Hello?
Telemarketer: Is this Miss Massey.
Me: May I ask who’s calling?
Telemarketer: This is John from whatever company it was.
Me: What can I help you with?
Telemarketer: Are you Miss Massey.
Me: Yes I am can you make this quick, what’s up?
Telemarketer: Yes, Miss Massey we’re calling today to see if you would be interested in using xyz to provide your merchants with credit machines for their merchant accounts.
Me: English and quick please? Are you trying to sell me something?
Telemarketer: We’re calling to see if you’d be interested in making some money for doing nothing but signing up new merchants?
Me: Not right now because I’m not on my time, I’m on someone else’s.
Telemarketer: Um, well Miss Massey you got me there, we’ll call back. (Never heard from them again.)
Click. Dial Tone.

I really enjoyed that one. It’s not often I come quick with something their script isn’t ready for, lol. How do you deal with sales calls at work and at home?



3 thoughts on “Mouth Off to Telemarketers

  1. Haha, I dislike telemarketers so much and sometimes I lie! Usually I say something like, “Oh, I’m not over 18, have a good day.” Haha, I dislike it when they just keep talking and talking and talking. :roll: I mean, I’m definitely not listening at all and I feel sorry for his/her throat! Well, eventually, I will interrupt them and just say, “Not interested, good day.” and then I hang up. I think what’s worse is the people who come to your door! Holy smokes, don’t get me started with them! šŸ˜†

  2. I have been letting my ds answer the marketing calls… he talks to them, and jsut says moms can talk. while i smile at him. who is this he will ask… then he will rely that to me, then he will say where are you calling from this is the good part… they will say company name… and he will say no what country, what state? then he will let them know all about the cartoons on the tube or just what ever he is doing… he likes to talk.

    I normally just hang up. one of my fav things to do though in the past was to critic them… say “look kid, I used to be in telephone sales, (i was at one point) and I can so totally tell your scripted, Then I would pitch there lines back to them sounding les sscrpted and they would be like wow, I’ll try that… I told them to ditch thier script:) no your produ ct and sell your pants off ppl. you dont need a script… and if you would nt want that product, dont try to sell it to someone… get a new job:)

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