Wednesday Fwd: Baked Beans and um, Have You Voted Yet?

Posted on

It’s Wednesday and you know what that means! šŸ™‚

But first, have you voted yet? I haven’t yet, but will be going this weekend. I am proud to report that the voter turnout in this state has reached all time highs, several major counties that have reported their first day of early voting, have also reported broken records because so many people are exercising their voice this time, making sure that their opinion is heard.

IT’S ABOUT DAMNED TIME! I have heard from so many people, “Oh what’s the point, my vote doesn’t matter..” or some other such bullshit. Yeah, it’s bullshit. Maybe those people just can’t make a decision or something but saying something like that to me certainly makes my opinion of them lessen. What American doesn’t want to vote? It’s UNAMERICAN! Project of the week, watch The Patriot. Then tell me you don’t want to vote.

It’s of utmost importance to set a precedent this election and in everyone after it, we’ve become so complacent that until now no one really did much about the way our country was ran. Now maybe because in good times it’s easy to just go with the flow or something, but I personally consider voting my utmost civic duty and the very foundation of American rights. I mean, don’t you?

I’m sorry but texting in your vote to F’n MTV Premieres isn’t enough voting. So do your duty (yes I said doody) and go vote! Vote Early, Vote Often!!!

Here’s the FWD for the day:

Baked Beans

(Grab a tissue; I think
you’ll be laughing so hard you’ll cry!)

One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became apparent that we would
marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up beans.

Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odor of baked beans was more than I
could stand.

With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so
I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas. Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see! me and exclaimed delightedly: “Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight.”

He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he
was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only
loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other
cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room, I went on like this for another few minutes.
The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signaled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself.

My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologizing for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not.
At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: “Happy Birthday!”

I fainted!!!!!!!!!!!


I gotta run some errands on the rest of my lunch, sorry for the late post guys, please forgive me, if you can read this through your tears of laughter that is BWAAAAHAAAAHAAAA!


[poll id=”2″]


2 thoughts on “Wednesday Fwd: Baked Beans and um, Have You Voted Yet?

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


CommentLuv badge