Surviving the Fallout

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Today I want to ask you about your friends….or rather, former friends. The ones who decided for some reason or another that they didn’t want to associate with you anymore. If you know why, discuss those lost friendships with me today, I am feeling a little miserable and would like some company.

Don’t get this wrong, I honestly don’t feel this friendship I have lost could continue after what she said, but I am sad over the loss just the same.

So for what reasons have you lost friends? I’ve lost several through the years and most of them were due to time and distance issues, I am not an incredibly social and outgoing person so I have never really had more than just a few close friends. The loss of one is a big loss to me.

I’m probably not the only person in this country who has lost a friend over this election, or others for that matter. This was a HOTT election, we had the first female ever running for the presidential seat as well as the first black man running for the presidential seat. And the man won. I know a lot of people are happy, and a lot of people are NOT so happy. Sadly a few friendships I’m sure have fallen out due to this. I think it’s a travesty to let politics come between friendships, unless of course, you’re a politician, then you have to be kind of picky I suppose. LOL.

But I’d like to hear from you about this, I know I can’t be the only one. I think the part of this that disgusts me the most about all the crap I’ve heard about Barack Obama becoming president is the racist remarks. When are the people of this country, of this fucking world, going to realize that COLOR DOES NOT MATTER!

But I am a patriot of the worst kind, I tend to think it makes a person appear to be, at least to me, of lesser of intelligence to be a racist, a hater.

I believe racism is a product of ignorance.

Ignorance of the fact that every family has it’s derelict, it’s got nothing to do with race. It has to do with family genealogy, a persons’ free will and how they were raised. I could get up on my soapbox about this all day long, but at the end of the day the result is still the same.

Only a few people will ever hear my voice echo the same thought so many millions of people have had before, to include Dr. Martin Luther King. It’s no mistake that Dr. King was placed next to our president elect on T-Shirts leading up to election day. He had a dream, and it’s being realized. What a day November 4th was!

I got emotional during Barack Obama’s speech at the end of the night, I too believe this country needs work, and a lot of it. All of his words hit home to me and to hear my “friend” tell it, he’s “just” a good public speaker. I don’t think so, I think he’s tapped into the minds of the majority of America and I too believe that the preference for the rich people and corporate America needs to be second to those of us in the middle class, those of us on Main Street, those of us opening businesses and creating jobs. I’m ready for change. And very tired of sacrificing for the morbidly rich.

But my decision has one casualty. The person I thought was my best friend. I realize now that she must have been judging me the entire time and has a really good poker face, but I’m still hurt.

Talk to me folks….even if I’ve never heard from you before, I know you’re there, I know you’re reading. Break your silence today and tell me about your experiences with friendship and what has made, or broken, some of yours.

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5 thoughts on “Surviving the Fallout

  1. I have lost many of my friends over time and space. Like you I am not outgoing, and live in the here and now. I have not lost friend over election. I have strong opinions. My DH has gone to the “other” side since I married him and we have very different opinions. Another friend and I debated, different views in the end we agreed to disagree. “Hey I know I am not gonna change your mind and you ain’t gonna change mine!” If a person can’t respect that then I would question their try intentions, are you my friend for me or for other reasons?
    Great post

    Susan Lindgrens last blog post..Too Much

  2. Yes. I lost a 10 year friendship over this election and it was my decision to end it.
    Here’s why:
    Over the years, she’s changed. She became more religious, I’ve become more agnostic. Her more conservative, I more liberal. I thought we could talk about these sort of things and she understood that while I didn’t agree with her, I would never resort to calling her names. The things I argued my points with were facts, her with Bible scripture.
    Then she started calling me names. Because she felt that my ideas were a threat to her well being. She thought that somehow because I supported a guy who was pro-choice it was pushing us closer to the “End Times”. That people like me were the reason for everything being so messed up.
    It got to the point where I realized that we only shared superficial understandings, and to the core, we were two very different people. And I felt that she looked down on me in spite of everything I’ve accomplished.
    And maybe your friend had kooky ideas like my friend did. I know it hurts..but you have mourn and learn to let go. You have to surround yourself with people that are willing to disagree you without getting angry. In my opinion, avoiding subjects like politics and religion is like lying they are very much a part of who you are.

  3. Who have I lost, Humm I did oncve lose my bestest pal ever to cocain, but she comes back for visits sometimes:) I love her and she I and we would do anything in the world for each other. I just choose not to llet her addiction be a part of my life.

    I also have lost a good friend from distence. and until I go tmy job with Mommytalk I swore I would never ever go to NYC I’m the small town gal…big city not good to me. When i told her I would never come to NYC to visit she cut her ties:( figured whats the sence, right? anywho when I found out that I had to go for work I called her and we hooked up and she told me she hadnt called in 7 yrs because she didnt thi nk it was worth it if she wasnt ever going to see me again… We are cool now.

    And the only friend that I lost and havent gained back was a very good friend all through HS I listened to allher sob stories poor poor her allthe time. and on my wedding day ….MY WEDDING DAY she was in line getting ready to go downt he isle befor me and all she was doing was complaining about how shitty that it was that she had to drive her dads cadilac cause her BMW was broken I turned and snapped out on her. Shut the fuck up! its alwways about you! IT my Wedding day! OY I was pissed…she played nice for he rest of the day … I called and apoligized to her on the anwering machine because she wouldnt answer the phone. We never spoke again…No lose really always sharing the bad times never good….blah!

  4. “i do not always agree with this because there is such a thing as being open-minded and having discussions that allow you to agree to disagree” I agree completely, in fact, until now I didn’t realize that I would get that reaction, but that being said, this is the first time we’ve disagreed on a candidate for presidency. Previously we’ve been able to discuss the merits of all different fields of politics, including religion.

    You are right, and I will be far more guarded with my opinions in the future, sadly.

    I will definitely keep you in mind for a shoulder 🙂 I appreciate that so much seeing as I’ve lost a good friend. 🙁

  5. it is said that we should not talk about politics with others…especially when you don’t have the same views. i do not always agree with this because there is such a thing as being open-minded and having discussions that allow you to agree to disagree. this election caused rifts amongst my family. it truly saddened me.
    Politics is not a reason to be nasty to your best friend and as a result, end a relationship. It’s really too bad. Of course there are 2 sides to every story so I am not sure why she said or reacted the way she did. Just know that you are not alone. As I twittered to you moments ago, it’s like a break up with a boyfriend. it could even feel like someone died. i don’t even know you but am sorry you are going through it.

    and FYI…i “friended” you on lastfm because i noticed we liked some of the same music.

    holla if you need advice. i have gone through so much in my relationships with friends. 😉

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