It’s the holiday season, the time of year when everyone is supposed to be on their best behavior and put up with the most crap from people. Drunk relatives at dinner on the holiday, relatives in jail on the holiday, gossipers, mean spirited people, they all need love during the holidays.
Regardless of the dysfunction in your own family, it’s good form to swallow your pride, show up and smile and make like you like these people. They are after all the reason you are the way that you are, and we’re proud of that aren’t we?
So go ahead and use this post as your personal purge place of all that is your holiday irritation. Something happen every holiday that you’re not looking forward too? We’ll comfort you, share here, we all have that one thing that we know will happen that really gets under our skin.
I’ll start. Growing up, my Mom didn’t express a lot of care, affection or any of that sort of gushiness you expect from mothers that love their kids to death. However, the grandkids are a different story, they get love, gushiness, the whole ball of wax. It grosses me out. I’m glad for the kids, they need it and should have it, so it’s great that she does it for them, I just can’t help but wonder if it’s an act to be accepted.
The best way to teach people how you think they should be is to be that person. Do the things you’d like other people to be doing and if you’re in a position of leadership and the people who should don’t take that hint, then you take it a step further. At that point I think it’s safe to say that the ground rules have been laid and you need to make the point more obvious.
Here’s the problem I have, I was at a restaurant eating a few weeks ago when I heard someone tell her child, “Do as I say not as I do”. Seriously. The person she was speaking to, obviously her daughter but a grown daughter at that so of course, I’m hoping she meant it in jest. You know how I feel about that take on life, “do as I say…” but I’m too good to follow my own rules. That’s bullshit.
The bosses I adored were the ones down there in the trenches with me. Bosses are supposed to lead by example, teach you what you need to know, coach you periodically and support you when you need it. But most importantly they can and will do your job if necessary and they can definitely tell you how to do it again if need be, though it’s not a favorable position to put yourself in.
Let’s just speak over what should be common sense rules for the workplace:
1. Keep cell phone use to a minimum if at all, it should be about your kids.
2. Show up ON TIME.
3. Do your job.
4. Stay off the internet, unless of course your job requires that you be on it.
5. Respect your boss and listen, they’re the boss, not you.
6. Don’t assume your boss is too stupid to notice your stall tactics.
Those are some of the most basic rules of the workplace and decency that come to me right off the bat. Feel free to add things…
It has been brought to my attention on more than one occasion that I’m not very affectionate. It’s true, I’m not. The rerason, I believe is because I didn’t grow up arounf affectionate people, it wasn’t a behavior I learned. On the contrary in fact, aside from my sisters, hugging and all that jazz only happened on Holidays.
That’s just an explanation of why I believe this is the way I am, its not exactly the best way to be, mind you I hugged my son like crazy when he was little. I give him his space usually now.
The problem with that is this, people around me feel neglected and that I’m cold, it doesn’t help that I have a sharp tongue.
I know I’m not the only one like this, my family isn’t the only family that’s not what I call “touchy feely”. Has it affected your relationships? If so, what have you done to mend it?
I try to remind my family that I do love them and overall they know I care, I’m sure its the same with your family, tell me what steps you take and the little things you do to show your family you care.