Holding Pattern

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I realize on cup of coffee number two that..for the last two years…I’ve kind of been in a state of flux. I think I’ve had a few short bursts of clarity but what is that?  Times where the future seemed promising and full of wonderment. This should be an exhilarating time in my life and I find myself frequently lacking motivation.

Confused at times, unsure of my next step and worse! Second guessing myself. Could this be a rare burst of clarity?  One of those that may soon be forgotten?  I should hope not. 

I think I’m going to have to re-learn how to be a student. Not just for school, but of life. I talk about going back to school a lot, and most recently figured out finally what direction I want to go with it..and it’s going to take a while. Add in my lack of motivation and bang..stuck.  Further. I’ve been stuck in a reaction state since my grandmother passed and I think I’m finally seeing my way clear of that.

Wow 🙂  I feel lighter!