MouthyGirl.com

It’s Not the End of the World

In April of 2009 I quit my job as a legal assistant for a work at home job….and it didn’t work out….my “employer” ended up not having the ability to pay me when his financial backing backed out. I hadn’t been out of work a day in my life since I started working and I didn’t know what to do, where my next rent payment would come from and how on earth I was going to feed the family on one salary when we’d been barely making it on two.

This is not the first time I’ve dealt with a life changing circumstance.

First, I told myself, be positive. I said self, “I have always been employed, it stands to reason that I am a reliable, important employee and someone needs me or I’d have been out of work a little more often.”

It was scary, eye opening and now that I look back without my rose colored glasses – I should’ve known better than to make an emotional decision. At the heart of the whole thing, I hated my job and it wasn’t the job, it was my boss. He had a way of making you feel like the smartest dumbass on the block and he was the only one that could bring the genius out. I had to part ways with that man and I took the first train out. If I had thought it through more, I would have realized that making that jump was a bad idea.

Suddenly, two weeks after my 30th birthday, I realized I didn’t have a paycheck coming and made the first of what I expected to be a few phone calls to borrow money until I got a job, from my family. I was very fortunate that I had someone that I could call, then I touched up my resume, which I’d been doing for a while anyways so there wasn’t much to be done there, and then I started scouring the area for jobs.

I was scared of what would happen, uncertain of our future and not sure how long it would be until I found another job, let’s face it, they’re not in the plentiful supply that some of us have been used to in other times. I found a job though, and it happened quicker than I expected, I have a large skillset to offer as well reliability, accountability and consistency. My resume speaks for me and I can interview pretty well most of the time.

“When your work speaks for itself, don’t interrupt.” -Henry Kaiser 1882 – 1967

It wasn’t the end of the world, as with most trials that we face in life, it was scary but I survived. Hardships in life present themselves for two reasons, you bring it on yourself with a bad decision, or you have an external influence that screws the pooch, the pooch being you.

Ultimately, you have two choices in facing it, play the victim and feel sorry for yourself or formulate a plan and take action to solve the problem. It’s up to you, but know this….a bad situation doesn’t have to be the end of the world.

Tags: end of the world, harship, income, jobless, panic, salary, two income family, unemployed, unpaid, work at home

Be a Fighter

Yesterday I received some scary news from a person close to me, my bff. I’ve loved my bff since the day I met her and have always felt protective of her and this new has come as a shocking reality to how cold life can be.

We’ve all heard stories of fighters, leaders of men and strong people who have gone through hell and made it back to a normal, seemingly normal life. My bff is a hero in her own right, a leader of men and a fierce opponent to all who cross her. From a very young age we shared a common bond, a tumultuous, often fearful life. We shared our grievances of life as young adults and despite a significant age difference, always maintained a like frame of mind, a mutual respect and love. We’ve held each other’s hands through hard times, uplifted each other and stayed as close as we can though our personal lives have their additions and distractions. There is no other person on the planet that is as close to my heart as she.

There’s been scary news before and my bff fought it like only the strongest among us can, with her chin up and her heart strong. We thought she may never have children after her daughter, but she now has a beautiful son as well. As I write this I weep for her, and admittedly I cried on the phone even though I was trying so hard to maintain my composure, to be there for her as she needed me to be. I am weak and cannot imagine how hard that call must have been for her, how she didn’t crumble into self pity as I might’ve is beyond me. She is as strong as the world could ever ask her to be.

Things like this defy logic to me, these problems come to those that least deserve it and I know that it could still be nothing, as I said to her yesterday. It could completely be an irrelevant issue when it’s tested and this could all be an exercise in recognizing our mortality. At least we can honestly say whatever it is has to have been caught somewhat early, as it’s only a piece upon an organ, but it’s a scary little fucking piece of the unknown.

I can only hope one day I can be a fighter like she is. My bff is incredibly important to me and all that know and love her, she is strong, independent, funny and beautiful. She shares a lot of qualities with you and me, she tries her best to make everyone happy and tries to save a little for herself too. To those of you that are religious please say a prayer for her, to those of you that are not, send a nice thought out into the universe for her please, anything can help in this time of the unknown.

To my bff, I love you and I am here for you in any way that you need me to be.

Tags: beautiful son, bff, close to my heart, common bond, composure, distractions, frame of mind, grievances, leader of men, mortality, mutual respect, personal lives, self pity, shocking reality, tumor, young adults