Unexpected from now on…just deal with it.

I sit here in MY apartment ..alone. It’s quiet nights like this..listening to Three Doors Down (mistake #1) ..that I miss having a man. It’s this loneliness we so abhorr.  Here without you baby…man without a face.

Yeah. Sux.

For the last several months I’ve been on a personal mission to change. Almost everything. Who I am will always be the same granted..but I’ve hid myself away and been afraid to experience life.  I won’t do it anymore..I am 32 and have just started dating for the first time.  Started going to bars.. couple parties.. I’m living.

It’s pretty badass. I’ve replaced most of my clothes ..by default I’m happier with my life..my situation.  I’ve done whatever I wanted..whenever I wanted and no one has uttered a word of dissension. Why? Because I have self control. I’ll push farther than I should..but I won’t hurt anything. 

I work hard and I always have..I have a new direction and new motivations ..but my dreams remain the same and you’ll see. It’s the beginning right now..